I Can't Wait

By Gary D. Crocker

The highlight of my junior and senior high school years was camping as a Boy Scout. I was in an active troop that found a place to camp nearly every month. I loved it, and measured time by those weekend outings. The Friday night truck rides couldn't come quickly enough. They would take us to such wonderful places as Joshua Tree National Monument, Oro Grande, Forsee Creek, Perris Valley and the Devil's Punchbowl.

We hardly returned from one outing before I was ready for the next! I daydreamed about it. "I can't wait until the twenty third, when we go to Forsee Creek. I hope there will be snow…" I would visualize the dining hall perched on stilts at the edge of a steep hill. A narrow path stretched down the side of that hill to the creek below. That path was our sled run if there was enough snow. The cabins sat on either side of a large clearing. The older of the two was a log cabin with a rustic fireplace. Here we would gather for the annual telling of the story of the "Forsee Giant." We loved being scared to death by the tale of this giant slave whose ghost wandered about each night in search of his missing thumbs, cut off before his death for some forgotten reason. Of course the story was enhanced by well-timed (and prearranged) noises outside the smoky cabin. And at just the right moment, in would burst a screaming leader, frightening the first-time campers and assuring them of a sleepless night.

Each campsite had its own set of attractions to me. Oro Grande had a shallow river over which we often built a rope bridge; Joshua Tree, hiking trails and giant rocks; the Devil's Punchbowl, fascinating twisted rock formations. Each month I eagerly awaited my immersion into the joys of one of those places. I don't know that I had any one favorite place. I enjoyed them all!

When we were actually on our way, or were there, I had a silly little phrase that I recited in my mind (never out loud!): "Just think, now's now and now I'm on my way to…", or "Just think, now's now and now I'm at…" This was my way of reveling in the fact that I was actually, at that moment, doing a favorite activity. Of course that went the other way too: "Now's now, and now I'm on my way back." That was the gloomy side.

All through my time in the Air Force I did the same thing. "I can't wait until I'm out of basic training." "Just think, now's now and now I'm on my way to Biloxi." "I can't wait until my next four day break so I can go to Athens." "Just think, now's now and now I'm standing on Mars Hill." "I can't wait until my trip to Israel." "Just think, I am actually walking through the streets of Old Jerusalem." And so it went, until "Just think, now's now and now I'm out of the service. I can't wait until … until … until what?"

I realized something at that point. I had been dwelling outside the present most of my life, looking forward most of the time to some brief event in the future. I was not really content with the moment, unless it was one of those short spans when I was doing something I particularly enjoyed. I did not really like everyday life. I had memorized Philippians 4:11b from the Bible sometime along the way during high school but had not applied it to time. "I have learned in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content."

God has given us every moment from our births to our deaths to live in time. Some of those moments are more enjoyable than others. Not all are enjoyable at all. Some are downright painful! But we can be content in every moment if we recognize that God is with us, and He has us where he wants us and when he wants us there.

I still look forward to some moments more than others; and I revel when the present coincides with favorite activities. But I am learning to be content at the other times too.